Give Me Flaky or Give Me Death!

Concrete is made with 1-part cement, 2-parts sand and 3-parts gravel. Water is added to this mixture to activate the concrete and to make the slurry pliable or workable and can be added in quantity of personal preference. This 3:2:1 ratio is ancient and has stood the test of time. Concrete can be reinforced to improve its tensile strength or it can be molded into limitless shapes. It can be used in utilitarian purposes (think parking garage) or to create wonderous works of art. Take a look-about; thus has mankind built the modern world with this simple but amazing 3:2:1 ratio.

Early European settlers in the New World brought with them a food preservation method whereby chopped, cooked meats and other ingredients would be wrapped in a paste made from flour and water that would dry to a hard crust. These preserved meat dishes were referred to as pyes, which is weird, so they changed the name to pies which makes much more sense. When ready to enjoy these meat pies, the crust was discarded and the delightful fillings were much enjoyed and appreciated.

Bear with me.

As the New World society quickly became established and began its rapid advancement, both in technology and land acquisition, it occurred to someone, probably a woman, that it was ill-advised and wasteful to continue to discard the protective crust of the cherished meat pies. If only this container could be made palatable! After much unfunded research and development, she hit on a possible solution. Add some fat. This seems obvious to modern folk; if you want to improve any food, just add fat, but we should not judge people that did not have our advantages.

The fat she added was more likely than not, lard. Now all that was left was to find the right combination of these three ingredients. After exhaustive labors, this was the final result:

3 – parts flour

2 – parts fat

1 – part water

And at last, the perfect pie crust was developed and it is still the standard pie crust in the United States. It is easy to make; its ingredients are few, it flakes beautifully and the result is extremely versatile.  

Look familiar? That’s right, American Flaky pie crust is made using the same ratio as concrete. Amazing!

When cold fat (now we usually use butter) is incorporated into the flour to make something that resembles peas and then cold water is slowly added, gluten development is discouraged and if the resulting dough is allowed to rest in a cool place, then once cooked the crust becomes very flaky, with excellent mouth-feel and compatible with a great variety of fillings. 

American Flaky pie crust proudly and gallantly survived the trials and tribulations of Colonial life, the Revolution, the Civil War and even two World Wars, but now it faces its most significant challenge to date. A challenge that could fracture the very social compact of American pie makers from sea to shining sea. 

The French, who are never, it seems, able to make up their minds, have long promoted the use of three separate pie doughs. Pate Brisee is used mainly for savory pies such as the meat pies discussed above. For sweeter pies and tarts the French use Pate Sablee and Pate Sucree. 

I have perceived recently an underground movement, whisper quiet and subtle among culinary radicals to promote, nay, insist on the use of Pate Sucree in the production of American pies, with the false promise of improved compatibility with component ingredients and, even more insidious, modern American tastes. Lies!

In addition to flour, fat and water, the usurper, uses egg and sugar. The resulting product is over-sweet to the point of being insipid and won’t flake even if attacked with a jack hammer. No patriotic American grandmother would make an apple pie with such an imposter.

Slowly and inextricably we are retreating into our separate corners on this most important and urgent issue. Passions are inflamed, divisions are deep and our way of life and our values hang in the balance. Neither side seems to have any appetite for compromise and the louder we proclaim our stance the more the other side seems to stand their ground. We are at an impasse. Can we find a way out of our corners or are we doomed to sink further and further in to tribalism and intolerance? American Flaky or Pate Sucree; it appears to be a binary choice.

I think I have made it pretty clear that I proudly stand with American grandmothers in supporting the preservation and honor of our traditions; our American Flaky pie crust means something, it is who we are and it is what made America great. But this disunity cannot stand. I fear we are nearing the breaking point. I fear for the faltering of civility and that pie throwing will replace pie eating as the way we interact with one another.

Can we preserve our traditions and our traditional values while at the same time we acknowledge that the world is changing?  Perhaps together we can imagine a better world in which both American Flaky and Pate Sucree can both contribute and flourish. It will not be easy, that I can tell you! 

Is it possible that the grandmother that discovered the American Flaky ratio of 3:2:1 would have added sugar if she had access to it? It is impossible to answer, but we would be living if a different world if she had. Food for thought.

Is it even possible to agree that American standards like apple, cherry and peach be made with American Flaky, while contemporary (I almost said immoral) products like kiwi/strawberry or passionfruit/mango be made with Pate Sucree? I hope there is room for both. 

The 3:2:1 ratio has served America well. It built our infrastructure and it graced our tables. It built great cities and it filled grandma’s house with the scents of love that we cherish for a lifetime. You can’t eat concrete and you can’t build a bridge with pie dough, but at the most fundamental level they are, like us, linked together, different, but the same.

We can, each of us, determine that we will not use 3:2:1 to harden our hearts like concrete, but that we will use it to soften our hearts like chocolate cream pie, which by the way, is delicious whether it is made with American Flaky or Pate Sucree. 

R.I.P.T.N.L.J. 8119

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